Note: These shorter posts are reshared from content on my Instagram. I’ve found it easier these days to write shorter reflections there, but still plan to hit up this blog once in a while for longer pieces too!
Marvelous, infinite, matchless grace
Freely bestowed on all who believe,
You who are longing to see his face
Will you this moment his grace receive?
– Grace Greater Than Our Sin
As a kid, I got stomachaches in the middle of the night. I’d want to wake my mom but was afraid I’d get in trouble. I never got scolded, but even so I’d wait until it was unbearable.
I’ve come to see I do the same with God.
There’s no such thing as cheap grace. There‘s presumption, the wrong notion that love looks at sin and says, “whatever, no big deal.” But that’s not grace. Grace is costly. All who’ve come to love our crucified Christ know this.
Sometimes though, the enemy takes my understanding of costly grace and twists it. He says to me:
…You’re going to pray about that again?
…Shouldn’t you be doing better by now?
…Can’t you handle this one on your own?
So I try to. Because I don’t want to presume on God’s kindness. I don’t want to test his patience. I don’t want to keep being so needy. I don’t want to get scolded.
But I am needy, and God knows I needed these words this week:
“Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you.” (Isaiah 30:18)
It turns out that I test God’s patience my own way— by not going to him. I have tested him, and he has proven to be so, so patient.
Just when we think we’ve out-asked, out-needed, overestimated him—when we finally come to him— he exalts himself in showing mercy.
So beloved, pray about that need again today. Come to him broken, come sinful, come wanting.
He waits to be gracious to you.